Diary of Selma Muller Moore, 1919-1922

The collection consists of a handwritten diary kept by Selma Muller Moore during the dissolution of her marriage. She describes her feelings about her husband's love for other women; his guilty and suicidal feelings as well as his apparent fear of going insane if he remained with his family; her own depression; conflicts over children and property in the process of coming to a settlement; and the responses of family and friends. She also observes that her expectations of marriage differed widely from her husband's, noting that her ideal was "to be the most perfect little housekeeper and homemaker" while he wanted her to share his interest in nature and wildlife and accompany him on his trips to the woods, leaving the housework to servants. She also describes her husband's early love for his cousin and how he felt the collapse of this youthful romance blighted his life. His renewed love for this cousin, who he ultimately married, as well as his earlier infatuation with Moore's sister, are recurrent themes throughout the diary, as is the scandal of divorce. She notes, "It is so humiliating to be left by one's husband. I just feel as if I must withdraw to some lonely spot or some sin stricken spot with my children where we can grow to give out a radiant light to others whose lives are darker than ours." Her conflicted feelings towards her husband are also recorded, with her noting "I look at Robert sometimes and am simply lost to know what to think of him." On a bitter yet humorous note, she writes, "I feel I must make hideous faces at him whenever I get a glimpse of his long lean angular figure." She also writes about reliance on her religious faith although this wavered at times. Robert attempted unsuccessfully to bring a divorce suit against her in 1919, alleging jealous outbursts on her part as one of the reasons. This case was dismissed in late 1919 and Moore writes, "I am not feeling as Christian-like and forgiving as I ought to--I just wish I could rise to a higher spiritual level. I feel so very much like a person would--who is NOT filled with the spirit of Christ." The diary concludes with Moore's discovery that Robert has married Margaret. A typed transcript is also included. She also notes that if she could live her life over again she would be a missionary.

Moore wrote her diary entries on loose sheets of paper, rather than in a bound volume. The first three folders of the collection contain these pages, while the final folder consists of a typed transcript of the entire diary. The transcript includes some biographical information about the Moore family.